Last day before heading back to classes, and the time I could have spent studying is over, not wasted, but lost.
Somewhere in the last week leading up to the break/study week I started to get scared and anxious and all the good work I had been doing seemed to become lost, along with my motivation. Anxiety had reared it´s head, and I seemed to be swallowed by the beast. I knew what I should be doing, but I started to question myself and if I should really be at nursing school and if I would make a good nurse. I became mildly depressed because of all the ¨I should¨ thoughts running through my head.
Last night we had some people over for dinner, including somebody who was a nurse and currently working as a nurse manager. We got talking and while I don´t have any stories of my own to share yet, I listened to the stories, I got to laugh, gasp and have input... And somewhere in all that I found myself reminded of why I was doing this.
This morning I awoke with a renewed desire to become a nurse and renewed motivation. I´m going to have to work hard at playing catch-up with the last couple of weeks and to get my assignments up to date, but I want to now and I have reason to.
8 years ago